Understanding Communication Styles at Work

A few weeks ago, someone messaged me on Instagram and asked:

“How do I survive as an emotional communicator with a literal, non-emotional lead?”

I loved this question. Not because it’s easy to answer, but because it shows awareness. This person wasn’t blaming their boss or labeling themselves as a “bad communicator.” They were noticing a difference in how people show up at work. And that awareness is SO important.

What they were really describing is a communication style mismatch. This is where, as a communications consultant, I can wax poetic about the difference in communication styles. And this is where communication/personality assessments can be incredible informative and helpful. 

I am privy to the DISC assessment. Have you ever done the DISC profile assessment? You can take it for free here if you are curious. 

DISC is a behavioral assessment that helps people understand how they tend to communicate, make decisions, handle conflict, and show up under pressure. It doesn’t measure intelligence, skills, or values. It simply explains how someone is wired to interact.

There are four primary styles:

D - Direct/Dominance

I - Inspiring/Influence 

S - Supportive/Steadiness

C - Cautious/Conscientious

Everyone is a blend of all four, but most people lean more strongly toward one or two. None are better than the others, they’re just different lenses through which people process information.

This is where the emotional versus literal communication gap often shows up.

DISC doesn’t label people as “good” or “bad” communicators. It simply explains behavioral tendencies like how people prefer to communicate, make decisions, handle conflict, and move through their workday. It gives language to differences that otherwise turn into frustration, misinterpretation, or silence.

DISC, in my opinion, is an easy way to remove judgment from the conversation. Instead of saying “my boss is cold” or “my coworker is too sensitive,” we can say, “They prioritize outcomes,” or “They prioritize people.” That shift alone changes how people understand others.

As for me? I am D.

That means I’m driven by results, action, and challenge. I move quickly. I’m direct. I like momentum. According to my assessment, I’m motivated by achieving outcomes and overcoming obstacles, and I get stressed by inefficiency, slow decision-making, and unnecessary complexity. HA - sorry to my husband and my assistant. 

Under stress or pressure, I can become blunt or impatient even when that’s not my intention.

What DISC helped me realize is that having EQ (emotional intelligence) and being results-driven are not opposites. But they do require awareness.

I care deeply about people. I value relationships. And yet, my default communication style prioritizes clarity and outcomes first. Without that self-awareness, I could easily assume others are over-explaining while they assume I’m abrasive (actual feedback I’ve been given in my career).

Neither would be true. We’d just be speaking different languages.

If you tend to communicate with emotion, stories, and context while your leader leans more D or C styles the goal isn’t to suppress who you are. It’s to learn how to communicate better. 

Here’s how I advise clients to do that.

Start with what matters most to the listener.

For D and C styles, that usually means outcomes, data, or risk. Once they’re oriented, they’re more open to nuance.

Instead of opening with:

“I want to explain what the team has been feeling and why morale has been off…”

Try:

“We missed two deadlines last quarter, and engagement scores dropped 10%. I want to explain what’s contributing to that and how we can address it.”

Same message. Different way of communicating it. 

Keep things concise. Literal communicators often skim for relevance. Long narratives can feel overwhelming or unfocused even when the insight is valuable.

And stories? They’re still just as important as long as they are anchored in data.

Practical Communication Templates

DISC-Friendly Meeting Prep

– What result am I driving toward?
– What data or facts support this?
– What context is helpful (but not excessive)?
– What decision or action do I need?

Email Template for Literal Communicators

Subject line: [Outcome or decision needed]

Hi xx,

Seeing as this quarter, the business is focused on [insert KPI here]. In the last 2 months, we have come across [abd challenges]. In order to solve for this, let’s consider [insert your ideas/solutions]. What are your thoughts? 

If needed, let’s schedule a time to meet on xx day to discuss further. Adding my calendar link here to find a time that works for your schedule. 

 Appreciate your time,

xx

With a multitude of communication channels at our fingertips, teams are more diverse in communication style than ever before.

Being an emotional communicator in a world of literal leaders and a work environment that moves insanely fast can be at odds with each other which makes it feel even more challenging. But it can be done. And when diverse communicators learn to work with one another, lean into their strengths, and respect their differences… that’s when true collaboration, innovation and magic happens!