New boss? 3 Tips for Building a Strong Relationship with a New Manager

Starting fresh with a new manager can feel like stepping into unknown territory. The professionals I work with 1:1 tend to need three things when falling under new leadership: they need to make a good impression, build trust, and set themselves up for success. And yet the reason they are working with me is to ensure they aren’t falling back into patterns where their skills and value are taken for granted or that their workload quietly grows without recognition.

That’s the tricky balance many of us face when we meet a new boss: we want to build trust, but we don’t want to get overlooked. We want to prove ourselves, but we also don’t want to set unrealistic expectations. The good news? With the right approach, you can lay a strong foundation that leads to respect, recognition, and partnership.

Here are three ways to lay the foundation for a positive, professional relationship with your new manager:

1. Position yourself as a partner 

When you’re starting a new reporting relationship, it’s easy to default to “proving yourself.” You may feel the need to be overly accommodating, saying things like, “I don’t want to step on toes.” But phrases like this can unintentionally minimize your role and make you appear hesitant, when what you actually want is to be seen as confident and capable.

Instead, flip the script: approach the relationship as a partnership.

Try framing conversations around:

• “My goal is to build a strong partnership.”

• “How can I best support you in your priorities?”

This subtle shift signals that you’re not just there to take direction—you’re there to collaborate. It positions you as someone invested in mutual success, not just individual output.

Imagine walking into your first 1:1 and saying, “I’d love to understand what success looks like for you in this role so I can make sure we’re aligned.” That one line immediately changes the tone of the relationship.

2. Lead with curiosity

When working with someone new, you don’t have the benefit of history or shared experience. That can feel unsettling, but it’s also an opportunity. Asking thoughtful, curiosity-driven questions is one of the fastest ways to build trust.

Instead of making assumptions about what they value, try questions like:

• “What’s most valuable to you in how I approach this role?”

• “What’s a top priority for you this quarter?”

• “If I’m understanding correctly, what I’m hearing is…”

These kinds of questions show you’re not just listening—you’re actively working to understand their priorities. They also help you gather valuable “data” on how your new manager operates.

One client of mine once used this approach during her very first meeting with a new VP. Rather than launching into a rundown of everything on her plate, she paused and asked: “What’s the most important thing you want our team to accomplish in the next 30 days?” That simple question gave her manager immediate confidence in her, because it showed she cared about aligning her work with his vision.

3. Communicate your “strike zone”

When you’re balancing both old and new responsibilities, it’s easy to slide back into old habits of saying yes to everything. That’s how recognition slips away and burnout creeps in.With her old manager, my client had become the go-to person for everything (even projects that didn’t belong in her job description). She was constantly praised as “reliable,” but behind the scenes, she was stretched thin and under-recognized.

With her new manager, she wanted a reset. The key here was defining her strike zone: the type of work where she added the most value.

That meant being clear about:

• What had changed in her responsibilities

• What was currently on her plate

• Where she could have the biggest impact

For example, instead of waiting for work to pile up, she took the initiative to say: “Here are the three areas I’m focusing on this month. I want to make sure these align with your priorities, are there adjustments you’d recommend?”

This way, she drew boundaries around her workload without sounding resistant or inflexible. And because she framed it around alignment, it came across as proactive and professional, not defensive.

By setting those boundaries early, you’ll not only protect yourself from being stretched too thin, but you’ll also make it clear where you add the most impact.

The Bottom Line

Working with a new manager can feel daunting, but it’s also a chance to rewrite the narrative. By positioning yourself as a partner, leading with curiosity, and communicating your strike zone, you create space for trust, recognition, and long-term success.

At the end of the day, your new manager wants the same thing you do: clarity, alignment, and results. How you communicate in those first few weeks can and will make a huge difference.